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cm0002@suppo.fi to Funny@sh.itjust.works · 23 hours ago

How to tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber

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How to tell the difference between a chemist and a plumber

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cm0002@suppo.fi to Funny@sh.itjust.works · 23 hours ago
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  • HugeNerd@lemmy.ca
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    13 minutes ago

    hyphen is your friend

  • VicksVaporBBQrub@sh.itjust.worksM
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    3 hours ago

    1.25 gpa here. That joke required searches on my part. I’m 48-ish now. If you cold ask me how to reduce a chemical equation, I’m going to say, “turn the Bunsen burner down to low”.

  • Avicenna@programming.dev
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    6 hours ago

    you can tell it verbally just pronounce it the way you think the other person would and watch for the reaction on their face when they get it

  • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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    18 hours ago

    “What’s the difference between curtains and toilet paper?”

    “I dunno. What?”

    “SO IT WAS YOU!”

    • psycho_driver@lemmy.world
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      12 hours ago

      Twenty years ago I was at my sister-in-law’s house for a New Years Eve party and got blasted by doing a combo of tequila and gin shots. They packed me away into a tiny side room (it was like a 125 year old house) with no heat and no blankets and left me to pass out. At some point I figured out I was freezing to death so I guess I ripped the curtains down and rolled up into them. Then I puked. A lot. In the morning I was the meat in a puke burrito.

      • man_wtfhappenedtoyou@lemmy.world
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        2 hours ago

        It’s amazing the things that trigger our memories sometimes.

      • justme@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        8 hours ago

        the meat in a puke burrito.

        glorious xD

  • hakase@lemmy.zip
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    22 hours ago

    My dumb ass pronouncing it “onionized” when I read it.

    • RogueBanana@piefed.zip
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      18 hours ago

      Must be a gardener then

      • Osprey@lemmy.world
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        15 hours ago

        Or a cook.

        • Slovene85@sh.itjust.works
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          2 hours ago

          ONYO!

    • ryannathans@aussie.zone
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      22 hours ago

      Mmmm tasty

      • justme@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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        8 hours ago

        geez, i just thought you answered yourself. who took the avatar from whom here???

        • ryannathans@aussie.zone
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          2 hours ago

          https://trending.knowyourmeme.com/editorials/guides/why-is-everyone-making-clippy-their-profile-picture-the-clippy-cult-movement-against-tech-companies-explained

  • Metostopholes@midwest.social
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    21 hours ago

    A while back I thought of a (much less clever) joke that only works in text:

    Do you know how hard it is to get an authentic French baguette around here?

    It’s a real pain!

    • LemmyFeed@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      1 hour ago

      I… don’t get it.

    • postman@literature.cafe
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      17 hours ago

      Change it to “A real pain” without the “it’s”?

      • PrimeErective@startrek.website
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        8 hours ago

        Isn’t it because it’s pronounced “pan”?

  • evidences@lemmy.world
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    17 hours ago

    My personal version of this, since the Republicans always call themselves the party of Abe Lincoln I spent the entirety of Bidens presidency trying to get a get joke setup for why do the Republicans call themselves the party of A. Blinken referencing Bidens secretary of state. But this doesn’t work audibly in any way.

    • InternetCitizen2@lemmy.world
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      7 hours ago

      A. Blinken

      Also the name of his band.

    • BeMoreCareful@lemmy.world
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      15 hours ago

      They didn’t say “Abe Lincoln”, they said “Hey Blinken”.

      • evidences@lemmy.world
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        13 hours ago

        Master Robin! You lost your arms in battle! How terrible, but you great some nice boobs.

  • KurtVonnegut@mander.xyz
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    18 hours ago

    I get that chemists are concerned with the ionization of things, but what do plumbers have with unions and unionisation? Are they famous for that? Or do not get something else?

    • baguettefish@discuss.tchncs.de
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      18 hours ago

      all kinds of tradespeople are often in unions, or at least more often than for example white-collar workers

  • 0li0li@lemmy.world
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    23 hours ago

    Quite good, wish it didn’t include the last comment below as it’s a pretty big hint.

    • venusaur@lemmy.world
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      22 hours ago

      Yeah. I was like, if you don’t get it from the second comment you’re just not gonna get it.

      EDIT: I was pretending to get it but I get it now and I guess the last comment is trolling?

      • Randomocity@sh.itjust.works
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        22 hours ago

        How is the last comment trolling? How would you tell this joke verbally?

        • venusaur@lemmy.world
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          11 hours ago

          Ah I was thinking no way to tell why it’s funny verbally

  • SourDrink @lemmy.world
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    20 hours ago

    Ununionionized

    • Viking_Hippie@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      18 hours ago

      Ionizing the union right out of it!

  • Hupf@feddit.org
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    16 hours ago

    https://youtu.be/EM1YYefSmKg

  • Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world
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    22 hours ago

    *orally.

    Text is still verbal.

    • ryannathans@aussie.zone
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      22 hours ago

      👀

      • Remember_the_tooth@lemmy.world
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        21 hours ago

        Fair enough. I guess the meaning has drifted. There’s no arguing with the descriptive nature of language. Lexicons are pretty much just language censuses. That’s important because it’s how language works. At least the older meaning of “verbal” seems to be preserved in legal and clinical environments. I feel like it has a value.

        For example, if someone is making sounds with their mouth that are not words, it’s oral but not verbal (under the older usage).

        Sign language or text could be considered verbal but not oral.

        There’s value in having a word that encompasses both written and spoken words.

        https://brians.wsu.edu/2016/05/19/oral-verbal/

        http://cooley.edu/blog/end-verbal-abuse?hs_amp=true

        https://english.stackexchange.com/questions/256370/what-is-the-difference-between-verbal-and-oral

        • stephen01king@piefed.zip
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          15 hours ago

          Interesting, this is the second time today I learned a word that had an older usage that I first thought was wrongly used by someone. I just learnt that jury-rigged is the original term for jerry-rigged, and thought it was only used in the context of courts of law, but it turns out it originally referred to jury masts on sailing ships.

    • ORbituary@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      22 hours ago

      Except no, it’s not.

    • deadbeef79000@lemmy.nz
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      19 hours ago

      I think it’s actually the other way around.

      E.g. oral history can still be written or recorded (audio or video).

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