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Open scene. The shadow of a nuclear blast eclipses the sun and our eponymus character holds onto his hat as photon trails bombard his glasses in slow motion. An orchestra of immense magnitude begins playing a single brass note, or a bunch of different ones at the same time it doesn’t matter.
Einstein rides up to him on a motorbike, spits on the ground, rubs his dirty hands on his greasy overalls. “What’choo thinkin’ 'bout Opey?”
Oppenheimer places one hand into his pocket, and the other adjusts his Rolex before flicking off his Oaklies and grinning. “I think it’s time we go mushroom picking.”
“Well sheeeet” muses Einstein in his native Swabish accent, whilst revving up his Harley. “I thought you’d never ask. Hop on you sum’ bi’h!”
Oppenheimer approaches the bike like Legolas approaches an elephant, and grabs onto the front handlebars, and does a sideways flip onto the back of the Harley, as Einstein burns a 180 and makes a beeline for the mushroom cloud as Lady Gaga sings a cover of AC/DC’s Highway to Hell.
“Most magnanimous, most magnanimous indeed!” mutters Nolan’s signature cameo character, watching the scene unfold as the camera pans to him, and he dabs mournfully.
I’ll take a large popcorn and a bag of sour patch kids. Thanks
Do you want skittles and cream with that?
Oppenheimer 2: the opening of the grave
This is where he wakes up from a dream and we find out he’s been in an asylum for 30 years.
He looks around, blinks, and goes: “Whoah…”
Then the nurse leans in and whispers: “Come with me if you want to live.”
You’re all wrong. We open on the Nevada desert and the president grabs Oppenheimer by the shoulders shaking him vigorously saying, “BUT WHAT ABOUT HYDROGEN!!”
Smash cut to the Bikini Atoll, the hydrogen bomb going off, and a pan over to Einstein (played by Bruce Campbell in a wig) saying in a very thick German accent, “Oh boy, here we go again!”
80s guitar riff starts and OPPENHEIMER 2: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO comes across the screen in neon yellow and pink.
Relevant WKUK: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_v8mJncl04Y
I would unironically watch that. It would need some energy from Inglorious Basterds though.
Oppenheimer 2: Thermonuclear Boogaloo
We will find a way to add The Rock to the franchise.
I liked the part of the movie where Oppenheimer said “It’s Oppen time to heimer” and then proceeded to heimer out all over the place.
Then he started heiming all over the place
What I expect from a Dr. of science
Nice, they are going for the NC17 rating.
Oppenheimer 2 invents time travel to go back in time to stop himself from creating the bombs.
Oppenheimer 3 Japan was able to take over the USA after it was able to secure German nuclear scientists allowing them to build nukes first. The lengthy and costly ground invasion allowed them the time to develop their weapon. Now Oppenheimer must reinvent time travel with the help of the resistance to set things back to the way they were.
“Did it work, professor Einstein?”
“Time will tell.”
Make it so the time traveling needs to happen by sliding a vehicle sideways at 88 miles an hour and call it Oppenheimer 3: Tokyo drift
Great (Japanese equivalent of the name Scott)!
You’re kind of describing the plot to Red Alert 3
Honestly, make it campy as hell, and I’d watch that
2 tries to be serious, 3 gives up and goes full camp
It should have the same “high quality” as the command and conquer FMVs. The plot is even adjacent
Bonus points if they include Tim Curry
I’m always for more Tim Curry goodness. But tbh, I liked the tone of RA2 more than the tone of RA3.
I’m still waiting for the Kung Fury sequel
Apparently still fucked by a shady investor and the whole lawsuit around it.
From what I read it could release in a few years, bit that might just as well be hopium.Hopium has helped me last on my long wait for silksong. Maybe this sequel will drop in the future.
I hope so.
Dang. I’ll just watch the first one again.
Oppenheimer 2: Atomic Boogaloo.
Oppenheimer: the 3-seasons-of-8-episodes TV streaming remake
Huge if true
