It’s not rocket science

Thank you for sharing, I can totally relate. I was in a very similar situation a few months ago.

Hey, in so sorry for all the hardship you had to go through 😔 But there’s hope, and it looks like is getting better from here, right? You are right to be angry at your past, but it’s not too helpful to stay stuck in those thoughts. The only way forward is forward, so rather look ahead. We all have scars, had our good and bass memories, they shape who we are, they make us unique. IMO it’s helpful to consider that people are doing the best they can, even if they isn’t perfect. Your mom might have problems, but she is probably also trying to live life and to parent as best as she can.

You are doing a great job by venting and by looking for community! I hope you get better 🙏

Are you okay with sharing an update on your situation?

Personally, I’ve had good experiences with couples’ therapy and taking walks together (either to talk about random stuff, or to talk about our partnership, ourselves). It takes some courage, but being honest with your feelings, your worries and your desires, in other words playing with open cards, can help your partner to understand you better and can help your marriage to grow stronger. Therapy can help especially in case some feelings overwhelm you both and you don’t know how to deal with them.

I’m so happy for you being able to experience his 🥰

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It’s honestly amazing

Awesome! I’m so glad you had a fun time 💛

This post reminds me of one by @QuinnyCoded@sh.itjust.works which actually got me wanting to try HRT before even realizing I was trans.

also omfg the progesterone is working why is everyone so pretty WHAT IS HAPPENING […] like I just FEEL things, like deep inside me.? is this normal? am i crazy? is this what cis girls feel all the time??? (source)

Thank you for sharing your experience! I’m so excited to start it soon, too. 😊

I wonder if this paying more attention to colors / pretty things is ADHD related…

Your trains are surprisingly reflective, kinda cool. Great shots! 😎

I wish I had a good solution to that problem… Honestly, I think going up to people like “excuse me, sorry to bother you but I needed some guidance… Do you know your way around transitioning?” with an awkward smile might just work. And a “no” is easier to suggest than if you’d randomly ask for friendship. I almost once pulled this off, but I had people nearby who I didn’t want to know yet. 😩

More like TotallyNotJesse

That’s great advice! I first bought all the things, but mostly ended up using only mascara and CC cream (to mask redness after shaving or a minimal stubble). For now, at least. It is enough to make me smile at my reflection. CC cream feels like a cheat, honestly.

That’s completely valid to feel somewhat anxious about! Luckily, this is no exam, you don’t need to score, you just need to somehow get the point across. You can do this 💪

Awesome, it’s great that you’re 1. discovering yourself, 2. planning the next steps and also 3. seek community! You have our support ❤️

I personally feel a bit uncomfortable framing transgenderness as a medical condition that needs to be diagnosed, though I get it on a technical level.

I’m not sure what to make of your “English please. 😭”. Maybe people can link you stuff that’s in another language, if you prefer that.

You’ll hopefully have a lot of fun exploring girly things! Don’t feel pressured to have to enjoy everything, or to be good at everything right from the start, or to educate yourself for hours before giving things a try.

Regular nail polish shouldn’t be to hard to try, but make sure to also get nail polish cleaner/remover. Personally, I noticed my intuition betrayed me, regarding which colors I like. [Note: I honestly don’t have much experience with nail polish, so take my advice with caution]

UV polish is slightly more involved. It gets harder & thus more durable than regular. You can try that out without getting a UV lamp if you simply do it on a sunny day and go outside / to an open window. You might need a base and top coast, so look that up if you wanna try UV.

It’s a big plus if you can try on stuff without having to commit by buying it, like if you have a friend that let’s you try out their nail polish or clothes. Thrift shops / clothing swap events are good to, so you don’t spend much money before figuring out what you like.

I’d love to hear/see updates, whenever you’re comfortable sharing! 🧡

Honestly, it’s quite a struggle to come to terms with it yourself. I can’t even imagine a professional telling me that I’m not, unless they are a terf and don’t want to be taken serious.

i went to my family physician completely unprepared, stuttered that I dissociate with my agab and he just looked at me confused and printed the required papers to forward me to a therapist. It’s not their job to determine if you are trans, it’s their job to forward you somewhere more specialized to make the call (decision).

You can do it, girl! 💪

Never thought of you in an[y] other dog mode 💖

tbh, militarisation, war mongering and propaganda are an issue in many western bloc countries, too (incl. Germany). You might also want to consider avoiding any country that’s actively preparing for a war against Russia. I hope you can find some place quiet.

Do you mean physically leaving the country, or finding a place to stay / get a visa? Regarding the first: I heard you can get anywhere when first flying to India.

In most regards, anything “typical for East Germany” doesn’t apply too much to Berlin. Also any larger German city tends to be left-leaning, even in East Germany. I don’t think you will easily end up in a far right (AfD) hotspot, unless you intend on going to rural areas.

Larger cities are however dirtier and more expensive. But it you want to go smaller, look for something with at last a few job opportunities and preferably an existing, “organized” LGBTQ+ community.

In East Germany you’ll at least find russian speaking people more easily (though likely >50yo and Ukrainians), if that’s a concern.

Studying in English is possible. I think German language classes are offered for free? Germany has welfare, but the government loves to (illegally) limit support below what’s legally considered a minimum income for a life in dignity. So expect having to struggle to make ends meet.

I don’t know about how easy it is for immigrants to get medical support, sadly. Hopefully someone else can answer that.

@dessalines@lemmy.ml being as sharp as always, thank you for sharing this! I somehow missed that essay in the past, and recently even had a discussion where I argued in favor of signal. His overview makes some great points that shouldn’t be dismissed offhandedly. The important point is to not make the mistake of shunning signal in favor of an even less secure alternative. Also the user’s threat model should be taken into account. Those who aren’t anticapitalists (yet) might need to worry less about the concerns.

How can you be sure that they do?