ink and cardstock!!

honestly just went “well its gotta happen after some time” so we just decided to send it. we were a bit of a very extremely nervous wreck with us posting this in the morning but it went well in the end. still was very much a late night impulse hehe, in fact we wrote the note the night before so we didn’t have the time to convince ourselves it was a bad idea in the morning.

(mothers reaction was, pretty much she was not surprised at all. sister was completely dumbfounded at how she didn’t realize…)

aaa femboys are so adorable!!

also !noncredibledefense@sh.itjust.works would probably enjoy this :)

we needed that this morning TYSMMM <33 ljakshfdlkjasdhf

there is no telling, most trump’s stuff is federal/countrywide stuff!! oregon itself has been fairly trans-friendly. name change was not too difficult (despite us having very unusual circumstances!) and like in our city if you just tell your medical provider you are trans, they will get you a prescription of HRT the same day. they asked for literally zero information hehe, just went “okay how do you wanna take it” etc etc. if you have public (state) insurance they cover like any gender affirming care, from what we’ve heard (and for us even extra estradiol).

of course, there is ICE, not in our city but a nearby city. the gender-affirming care stuff outlined above is lots of mostly policy, and while it seems to have held true, the trumpster has elected to try and make all such care for trans people unfeasible on the federal level. oh also despite changing our gender identity legally we are probably not going to be able to get a passport with the female gender marker uwaaa

for privacy reasons we won’t talk in depth about where we live in particular (not as a public post anyways, perhaps via direct message), but there are lots of queer folk here in our experience. those who live here (at least in the more western areas of oregon) seem to be quite friendly to trans people, but again the U.S. (federal) government really is not.

writing this in the morning so apologies if we’re a bit unclear. then again so is the current state of trans rights here!

we are happy to talk more in depth in dm about our experiences if you wanna

oh not in a very long while, our apologies. only when very young. more south germany though, but not since like age 5, and for only a few years. we currently live in oregon in USA. sorry…

you will get where you want to be eventually though, we believe in you <3

(then again we may be moving to germany oncemore in the not so distant future, so who knows!)

oh we probably started about a year and some change ago. we did not implement any real change in our daily habits until a while later, i.e. a few months ago. kinda did it subconsciously when meowing at randoms over proximity chat in video games lol

we very much did sound masculine prior. not like super deep manly (we are more young and testosterone was nowhere close to running its full course) but certainly like a guy, we definitely didn’t pass. thank you for asking, we so appreciate it!!

you sound more like a girl than not!! :D

the english part, most english speakers would focus more on the accent, but it sounds definitely not like a guy, still maybe androgynous? certainly feminine leaning a little. but that wouldn’t be what they focus on. the russian part does sounds rather femme though!!

what we would say (at least for english) is to try to make a higher pitch towards the end of the sentence, like asking a question but not quite reaching there. here is an example of our voice in english: https://voca.ro/11bM00n99Z0n (a lower pitch ending first, higher pitch second)

that aside though if we saw and talked to you in public we would mostly think “very cute pretty girl” hehe

hooray bootyshorts!!

uh a little stressful. was going to continue cleaning and fixing car but an approximately 1.5 ton pile of rocks magically appeared in our driveway on thursday. our family has yet to explain us why…

we’ll be visiting beach in a couple hours though, it will be the first time we’ve gone swimming in uhh… wow over six years at this point? anyways the dysphoria shall prevail no longer!!

also in the near future planning to go to the coast via bicycle. not the worst idea we’ve ever had though :3

finally we’re gonna be trying to get into some private pilot training. lots and lots of planning and stuff but wish us luck!!! (apparently still cheaper than college tuition by several times lol)

edit:

wait this is how the past week has gone. to answer that uh, family health problems. will not delve into the specifics but at least one night we had to bike over an hour home while very sleepy, the bus does not run that late sadly. lots and lots of taking care of others in general, both family and friends who are themselves not doing so well.

we suck at writing this week hehe sorry!!!

edit 2:

turns out the rocks are for landscaping. wish we were told a little sooner but oh well :)

You can piece together premade kits, you can modify existing things, or you could build things from the ground up. But you’re never really getting to the base level of creation. You’re not making your own bolts. And even if you are, you didn’t smelt the steel. And even if you did, you didn’t create the iron from nuclear fusion inside the core of a star. Unless you did, in which case hit me up, we should be friends.

• superfastmatt on the topic of metal 3d printing, circa april 9 2026

this gives noncredibledefense vibes hehe absolutely love it

we do not use any chastity devices, but in the past when wearing clothing that has been tighter around the crotch—and especially nylon or spandex clothing!—we have experienced something similar with pre-ejaculate fluid, especially since starting HRT. for us, the compression on the glans penis, peritoneal area, etc. makes it so that when the penis shifts around (or the clothing does), even though it’s only a very small movement it is perceived with much greater intensity.

the way we dealt with this was to either wear stuff made of cotton underneath, or to tuck in a way where not much pressure is being put on the glans itself. the type of chastity cage you have does, well, exactly what that second point mentions, but perhaps you could sew a layer of softer fabric over the device, perhaps with something like loose cotton to cushion it underneath. the caveat is that this can soak up fluids far more readily. but it may help!

you’ll figure out your own ways, so hang in there. here are our best wishes for the future!! xox

in prep for a meeting or giving a talk? or like also in between shops?

pretty much any time we are about to speak (or are speaking) and can do an exercise without being looked at funny. some of our favorites:

• the classic “1, 2, 3(, 4)”

  • in some situations this can be really weird, but it can be done quietly. example: when riding the bus, the engine obscures quiet talking. while the bus is fareless (it’s just get on & go), we still do need to thank the driver, ask to take a bicycle off the rack, etc… so this works perfect!

• saying what you’re doing out loud, like a checklist

  • example: before giving a presentation…

  plug in that, mmhmm… find our file where is ittt okayyy, bring that over there and that should do it. okay, [start to go into the presentation thereon]

• using higher pitch conversation filler, like mmhm, yuh huh, hm (but short nasal duration)

  • example: when it’s your turn on a cell phone call…

  mm, bring it around by noon, got it!

  hm, who told you that?

• in a similar vain, when about to start a conversation, start with something that can be pitched high or lower and not make too big a difference

  • example:

  ooh hello, your tube doesn’t look so happy… need a hand?

• when about to go in depth with an explanation or directions or whatever, breath in, and when exhaling try and make it sound femme too. this one is especially helpful for resonance!

• singing while riding the bicycle is not as helpful as these other ones, but it does help us to relieve some stress. it also has worked really well as practice in general.

in a lot of the stuff we have read, a common point amongst them is that nasals (“m”, “n”, etc.) are especially good ways to “establish” a particular pitch. we found The voice book for trans and non-binary people (Mills & Stoneham, 2017) has a lot of helpful exercises in addition to what we listed. there are some things that may not be in line with what your trainer suggests, but it’s still a good read.

it may seem like this will require a lot of diligence at first, and it absolutely does. after some time though it’ll become second nature, we promise!

thank you for sharing!

it is our pleasure!!!

yayyy it is so good to find a practitioner so supportive :D

really the start of us actually trying out our new voice was talking to ourselves, especially in the machine shop. it probably arose as it is the best way for us to communicate amongst ourselves, and if done right the femme voice doesn’t cause dysphoria. thus it was a lot of inadvertent practice on our own hehe. we still do a lot of “1, 2, 3” etc. prior to speaking, just to feel on the safe side.

interestingly, we found that when speaking english it sounded better in a recording than it did when we were speaking out loud, but in german language it is the opposite. reading off russian out loud is very hard no matter what…

uh prior to even thinking about voice training we did have quite a bit of experience with phonology and linguistics in general, which was definitely a HUGE help. most of our methodology for voice training came from books, some presentations, and a couple reviews and some other stuff too. we ended up putting together a slideshow that is basically a start to finish guide on femme voice training, and although we didn’t actually use it like at all, it did seem to help make the information stick in our head.

gradually we started using it with others, when we felt confident that we didn’t sound awful. our fear was that failing at doing a femme voice and sounding weird was worse than just sounding masculine. thankfully those we talk to are more nice!! in the end we still sometimes feel a little nervousness when about to talk (sometimes we take a recording to make sure we sound okay), and struggle a little with speaking louder, but it really has made a night and day difference with how we are treated.

voice training will take a fair bit of practice and effort of course. but you have it in you :)

we also experienced something similar to that. the redness does seem like a given no matter what we do, but for the other stuff we have found it does help to take a hot shower beforehand, and to make sure the hair isn’t too long (our epilator has a shaving attachment). the first time we epilated, we didn’t do this and it went uhh… not great.

also, some areas are also just more sensitive than others! our stomach area seems to be especially so.

we ordered our epilator direct from manufacturer for 110usd at the time, now it is 135usd though. it has worked satisfactorily, and looks to be designed and fabricated reasonably well. the basic principle of operation should be the same for yours though, then again maybe the material of the tweezers does have an effect? not sure.

best wishes though!!! you got this <3

yuh huh :3

HEY YOU’RE ON GUARD

it is so great to meet with other folk, you go girl!!!

I have slightly curly hair and have no idea what to do with it beyond shampoo and conditioner every 2-3 days

our routine often once or twice a week to wash the scalp and hair with conditioner, rinse that out, and then put more conditioner in to act as, well, conditioner! it seems to work well, every couple months or so we may use a shampoo.

we have used some information from this document: https://docs.google.com/document/u/0/d/1Q6Dj9WAZxlfBhJSyS5on2rw3-if5cOV3oV-dQ3B0AHA/mobilebasic (this link shouldn’t pester you for javascript). we disagree with a lot of the wording, but nonetheless it has been useful.

really the main thing with our curly hair is to never brush or comb it when it is dry, like ever. it will turn into a frizzy mess. wetting it does go a long way, but even then we really only comb it with our fingers. the only thing we use an actual comb for is our bangs, and they’re so short they might as well be considered straight. to get knots and stuff out, it is easiest (for us) in the shower with some conditioner in.

curly hair can be tricky, but you’ll get the hang of it, so forth for the other stuff too.

in short:

• you probably don’t wanna shampoo that often
• avoid brushes and combs unless your hair is wet and soaked with conditioner

best wishes and enjoy yourself <3

nothing in particular has been super eventful, but there is a girl who has been spending a lot of time with us when we eat lunch and so forth as of the week before the last, and who also has the kind of autism where like… she just spends so much time watching stuff on the internet. think like the amazing digital circus. she also has a pet fox and identifies as one (as a therian) herself!! (and yes her fox is cute)

oh also on an unrelated note we have decided to build a motorcycle from some stuff we had lying around our garage or the shop, plus whatever stuff we can scavenge for free locally. we’ve designed and built a go kart before, so, surely this couldn’t be that complicated…? :3

potato pancakes are awesome and very easy!! definitely do suggest, especially with applesauce.