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Ok kids, 30 is barely entering midlife. People start over at 40-50 all the time.
Wow this is insanely relatable. I’m 28 starting my life over, going back to college. I’m quitting the tech industry and hoping to become a lawyer to start suing tech companies instead of working for them.
To anyone struggling with - imagine self in 2050, cursing own ass that You did not it 24 years earlier. Would 2050 be too late? maybe? so start at that earlier.
Even if there be no 2050, You will be the one who did a fight… then, what if, there will be 2050 and You do curses…
I started over at 30. New country, new field of study, new everything and although it wasn’t easy (mostly because I didn’t even know the language), it could be done. Now, at 40, I’m learning Japanese just for fun and to keep my mind engaged. If you think someone at 28 is too old, I hate to break it to you, but you are terribly wrong. You’re too old only when you decide you are too old.
With 18 life is basically over
Being retired does allow you for a lot of free time.
First thing my parents did when they retired was pick a university degree to take to keep their minds active.
If someone can for fun complete a maths degree at 73, pretty sure it’s not too late for whatever you want to do.
Well,I also have to earn some money on the side.
i started over in my late 20s. new degree, new field, in a new city. if anything it was easier than it would have been earlier in my 20s. i knew what i was getting into and was motivated to make it work. it wasnt easy because i chose to study engineering, and i got a bunch of student debt, but i did it and i was able to pay off the debt a couple years ago. it would be even easier now in my mid 30s with an existing career to support me through it. its never too late.
Mood. After dropping out of uni and getting depressed, finally building up the courage to redo it. It’s not a study with super job prospects imo (history), but hey, at least it interests me.
I sadly don’t have the form of assburgers where I’m a math nerd, but oh well
Our brains only reach peak maturity after 25, in some cases later than that! A mature brain can better navigate the complexities of life and the education system.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with changing ones path at any age. If you find a better path, take it!
Worth noting that the study that people get the “maturity after 25” came from uses that number only because that was the oldest person in the study. It’s sometime after 25, we just don’t know how long after. We’re constantly changing and maturing, you don’t have to be committed to what you started at 25 thinking “this is it”.
Also it’s sort of common (experiential) knowledge in mental healthcare that addiction just hits the pause button on whatever developmental stage you’re in then sobriety unpauses it and you have to start dealing with whatever psychological stage you were avoiding at the time. So if you start using at 14 then get sober 15 years later you’re gonna be sorting out identity vs role confusion at 30 fucking years old. And the stages are really spaced out as you get older so if you turn into an alcoholic in your late 30s and spend 15 years before getting sober it’s not going to be such a noticeable gap since you were mostly finished with intimacy vs isolation anyway and you’re only missing like half of generativity vs stagnation.
TLDR; it doesn’t mess with your development only before 25 it’s just much more noticeable when a 30y/o still acts like a teenager than when a 50y/o still acts like a 35y/o.
Where would I read more about these developmental stages? I’ve not heard of them before and want to read more. I have a minor in child psychology from university, but that was so long ago my textbooks were on papyrus scrolls and I’ve not really kept up with the literature
The way I try and look at it when I’m starting to go on a downward spiral about the life I’ve wasted, is that I remind myself that the first ~20 years of my life weren’t even my own. I was born, then I was a toddler crapping in my nappy, then I went to school where I had to put on a uniform and listen to bells and teachers all day.
So basically, even though I’m 40, half of that wasn’t even my own life anyway. It was spent playing a role for the sake of others. And considering that I live in a socially conservative shit hole, it’s no wonder that I took so long to find myself once I was out of school. Or that it had to come from solitude and not from any awareness or encouragement from peers.
All things considered, it could be worse. I could’ve become an honorary boomer that yells at the kids to get off the lawn, in between scrolling conspiracy theories about Jewish space lazers and litter boxes in schools. But I didn’t and now I hopefully have another 40 years still left to live authentically.
