funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 days ago"I'm ready, you can start drawing the portrait now", Tom said imposingly.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up13
arrow-up13message-square"I'm ready, you can start drawing the portrait now", Tom said imposingly.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 days agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 6 days ago"I managed to take over the throne AND to lose weight", Tom was thinkingmessage-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up17
arrow-up17message-square"I managed to take over the throne AND to lose weight", Tom was thinkingfunwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 6 days agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 3 months ago"There's one for each male child", Tom said personally.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up14
arrow-up14message-square"There's one for each male child", Tom said personally.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 3 months agomessage-square0fedilink
minus-squarefunwiththoughts@midwest.socialOPtoTom Swifty Jokes@midwest.social•"I think we should have more waterfowl", Tom said productively.linkfedilinkEnglisharrow-up3·6 months agoAlternatively: “Sure, he’s only an amateur – but he still managed to dodge it”, Tom said unproductively. linkfedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 6 months ago"I think we should have more waterfowl", Tom said productively.message-squaremessage-square1fedilinkarrow-up16
arrow-up16message-square"I think we should have more waterfowl", Tom said productively.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 6 months agomessage-square1fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 7 months ago"I'm going to take a break from claiming souls for a while", Death said, repressed.message-squaremessage-square1fedilinkarrow-up18
arrow-up18message-square"I'm going to take a break from claiming souls for a while", Death said, repressed.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 7 months agomessage-square1fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year ago"Lacking", Tom said without meaning.message-squaremessage-square1fedilinkarrow-up19
arrow-up19message-square"Lacking", Tom said without meaning.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year agomessage-square1fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year ago"That faint odour just came back", Tom said reminiscently.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up113
arrow-up113message-square"That faint odour just came back", Tom said reminiscently.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year ago"Trump needs a better running mate", Tom dispensed.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up112
arrow-up112message-square"Trump needs a better running mate", Tom dispensed.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year ago"We are not cousins", Tom said unrelatedly.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up114
arrow-up114message-square"We are not cousins", Tom said unrelatedly.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year ago"It looks like you, and it does everything you do, and yet it isn't you", Tom said on reflection.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up110
arrow-up110message-square"It looks like you, and it does everything you do, and yet it isn't you", Tom said on reflection.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year ago"Tom got here after the other two", Tom said in third-person.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up16
arrow-up16message-square"Tom got here after the other two", Tom said in third-person.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year ago"It's fair in this specific context", Tom said just in case.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up13
arrow-up13message-square"It's fair in this specific context", Tom said just in case.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year ago"Well, Pumbaa, you should know that I've already bested your little friend at Battleship", Tom said sanctimoniously.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up16
arrow-up16message-square"Well, Pumbaa, you should know that I've already bested your little friend at Battleship", Tom said sanctimoniously.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 1 year agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years ago"Large semi-aquatic herbivores are vital to the health of the ecosystem", Tom said hypocritically.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up15
arrow-up15message-square"Large semi-aquatic herbivores are vital to the health of the ecosystem", Tom said hypocritically.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years ago"I might not have kids, but I can still self-identify as a father", Tom said transparently.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up14
arrow-up14message-square"I might not have kids, but I can still self-identify as a father", Tom said transparently.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years ago"This whole dissertation is a load of crap", Tom said in abstract.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up14
arrow-up14message-square"This whole dissertation is a load of crap", Tom said in abstract.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years ago"For your insolence in disrespecting me, I shall become a scourge upon your kingdom", Ishtar said urbanely.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up11
arrow-up11message-square"For your insolence in disrespecting me, I shall become a scourge upon your kingdom", Ishtar said urbanely.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years ago"I come to pay respects to mighty Genghis", Tom contributedmessage-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up12
arrow-up12message-square"I come to pay respects to mighty Genghis", Tom contributedfunwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years ago"I have committed no crime", Tom pled in a sense.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up14
arrow-up14message-square"I have committed no crime", Tom pled in a sense.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years agomessage-square0fedilink
funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years ago"I'll force that little demon to do something", Tom said, making an impact.message-squaremessage-square0fedilinkarrow-up12
arrow-up12message-square"I'll force that little demon to do something", Tom said, making an impact.funwiththoughts@midwest.social to Tom Swifty Jokes@midwest.socialEnglish · 2 years agomessage-square0fedilink
Alternatively: “Sure, he’s only an amateur – but he still managed to dodge it”, Tom said unproductively.