It’s definitely not stupid. It’s a nice hope to have. And no one knows what comes after so why not hold onto that if it’s something that helps you navigate this life in a positive manner. It’s literally not hurting anyone.

Personally, I don’t believe that anything comes after this life and that our consciousness is nothing more than an evolutionary trait that hominids developed to gain an advantage for survival. Therefore I have to keep my momentum going to make this life and whatever time so have left in it something that is worth enduring and enjoying. Grieving the life we didnt get to have when its appropriate, but recognizing that no one gets to have exactly the life that they want. At the same time, transitioning gives us an incredible opportunity to right some of those wrongs, perhaps more so than most cis-people get. In that way, I view transitioning, with all of its peaks and pitfalls, as an incredible gift. But I’ve also had an incredibly priveledged transition so I understand if other folks don’t view it that way.

Thank you!!! I just want more IRL trans fransssss lol

But fuck that. I want it and I want it now, that’s what it is. I’ve been fantasizing about this for years, way before I realized I’m trans.

For real. It may seem like I’m rushing through my transition and, from the outside perspective, that I’m being rash and not thinking things through. But in reality, these feelings have just been at critical mass for a long time, I just didnt say anything about it until now. So it sucks to be at the point where I need things to happen now but also need to wait for loved ones and the medical process to catch up.

Can’t even say I’m 100% certain it’s the right call, but I definitely don’t want to spent the rest of my life wondering.

Inaction is still action. I know what that life is like and it doesn’t work, so why sit stagnant in it when I could do something to maybe make life better.

Can’t say I’m super excited about having to dilate for the rest of my life or the infection risks, but I just hope it’ll be worth it.

Same. I just couldn’t close off the possibility without experiencing it first. I don’t want to disappoint myself later on because I cannot satisfy cravings that I could have because my anatomy doesn’t allow for it. And to have that due to a choice I made would probably induce a different type of dysphoria.

Wow, it brought the wait down ~2 years for you? Now I want a mental breakdown x).

Yea super fun, highly recommend… Lmao I am thankful that transitioning unlocked this sassy, spicy, bitchy side of me that helps propel my self advocacy. Not getting surgery this winter was not going ti be an option with the plans my wife and I have made moving forward. So I’m so psyched that I was able to find an alternative who is reputable, experienced, and comfortable.

Which means, the break me and my boyfriend are having is over.

Yea absolutely fuck that guy. My mom wished me a happy 1 year since coming out to her on that day. It makes me so happy that I now occupy at least a small part of my mom’s brain on that asshole’s special day lol

I don’t call myself a bitch without reason lmao

Congratulations! I consider telling my mother to be the kickoff of my transition. I did it on my shitty brother’s birthday so I now have a reason to celebrate that day lol happy to hear it went well :)

Interesting indeed, that’s a bit how I feel about my facial hair since I started laser. Still hate it of course, but knowing it’ll be gone soon surely calmed me down a lot. Though, I read even post-op may need some time for it all to actually settle in, surely a very subjective experience. Feel free to keep us posted :3

Yea at least with my facial hair, I feel better each time I have an electrolysis session. I’ve definitely grown addicted to the results, even if it is slow going. I can only do 2 hours a month since my electrologist is only around for a week at a time each month. I’ll definitely keep y’all updated, I’d like to do a total review of my overall experience at some point.

Well, I’ll need a time machine for that, so not the best odds :3. Took me about 6 months to kinda finalize the decision that I want SRS, if I could have it my way I would’ve done it the next day.

Girl truuuu lol a time machine would do wonders! I had a viewpoint before I actually started transitioning where I was like “I know that if I ever do transition, I am absolutely getting bottom surgery”. So it helped that the decision was pretty much already made. What did surprise me is that I was about 98% sure that I just wanted a minimal-depth procedure. But I was never able to feel 100% in that decision and because of that, I forced myself to reconsider my rationale and I realized that I was leaning more toward convenience rather than what I actually wanted. So I’m now getting PIV and I’m at 100% with it. In that way, I’m kinda thankful for my mental breakdown when I was looking at a 3 year wait since it forced me to think about alternatives.

Glad you’re back. I sent you a message on your other account. I hope you find what you’re looking for in these communities. I liked your video and I also listened to your music a little bit. I admire anytime someone shares something they create, especially if its something they’re passionate about.

Thank you!!! 💜

Thank you Domi!!!

Yeaaaaah I can’t stay still very long lol really though, I’ve been researching bottom surgery for years, even before I knew I was going to transition. So after I got my fertility preservation and hormone therapy figured out, I knew that getting the ball (heh) rolling on it was going to be one of my big goals, along with finishing electrolysis and voice therapy. I’m going to be getting it like almost exactly on my 1st birHRTday but its just because I’ve already done so much legwork already.

It’s been interesting how I’ve been feeling now that I have a date. I thought that maybe the dysphoria would alleviate knowing that there’s an end to it, but that wasn’t really the case. I’m a little worried that it’ll actually just continue getting worse in the lead up. However, I feel much more settled in my identity and I’m actually pretty proud of myself for continuing to pursue it and advocate for myself. Like the imposter syndrome has almost disappeared.

I hope your appointment goes well and that your timeline works out!

Are you on top of hair removal?

Nooooooo lmao my surgeon said it isn’t needed, they cauterize the follicles during the surgery. They said the most I should ever notice is an occasional hair on the dilator but the get like at least 95% of the hair. I’m getting electrolysis on my face but my electrologist is around me so infrequently that it would take years to get the hair completely removed.

Congrats on getting to the t-minus 1 month mark! Keep me updated on how its going if you’d care to :)

Yea I had a mental breakdown when I was told it’d be 3 years. I’m glad that I was able to get myself together and figure out another option.

I can’t wait to explore with my wife. We haven’t had sex for over a year because my dysphoria became so bad. So literally any improvement whatsoever in that department will be welcome. We’ve also talked about and are super excited to try the same things you mentioned.

I hope your revision goes well! Thank you so much for commenting :)

Thank you for sharing! I have some friends offering to meal train for me and I may take them up on it. Others are willing to hang out so I’m sure it’ll be nice to have some human contact and give my wife a break from doting on me for weeks on end lol I have actuay lost about 20lbs since starting hrt and I’m pretty active now. I definitely plan on going on more daily walks leading up though.

I really appreciate the tips :)

Fucking. Slay. Girl

So proud of you.

Also, I may be weird, but when my skin is shaved and super smooth, skin-on-skin contact feels freaking amazing! I don’t know why or how, it just does!

Def not weird, it’s literally the best.

Aaaah I live for window euphoria. It hides the facial hair shadow and blemishes on my face so Ican just be like “damn I’ll be fine as hell once I’m done with electrolysis”

It’s not difficult once you get used to the process and how it feels. I tuck pretty much every waking second as I have really bad bottom dysphoria. I learned from a wikihow lol and my tip is to wear two pairs of snug panties with a sturdy elastic waistband. I never use tape or a gaff and I am perfectly fine going out in leggings or booty shorts.

Quick addition: outside of the times when I use the bathroom and have to retuck, I can mostly forget that it’s there. If I’m not tucked, I am hyperaware that it exists all the time.

You know your body better than I do. But I just think that a couple days is way too early to notice or be concerned about any long term changes or consider changing doses. It takes weeks for the medicine to equalize in your system. That being said, sertraline and SSRI’s in general have a well known side effect of diminished libido.