Using this as a greeting with “good, you?” as the conventional answer is so stupid but so normalized, I feel much more strongly about this than it actually justifies lol
I don’t like small talk and avoid it with people who know me already, but if I’m masking and talking to a stranger I try to replace it with another meaningless question that’s less personal.
What question I end up going for is pretty context dependent, like if someone just arrived somewhere then “get here okay?” or similar questions about their transit are an easy replacement that’s a lot less invasive imo.
If the person has made any conscious fashion choices I notice and like that’s another easy one, though ‘conscious choice’ is key (“I like your hair” or “nice stickers on your water bottle” are good, but “you have nice skin” is serial killer vibes imo).
Finding alternatives requires a tiny bit of thought each time, but imo that’s what communicating with another person should need.
“How’s it going?”
Using this as a greeting with “good, you?” as the conventional answer is so stupid but so normalized, I feel much more strongly about this than it actually justifies lol
What’s your go to alternate?
I don’t like small talk and avoid it with people who know me already, but if I’m masking and talking to a stranger I try to replace it with another meaningless question that’s less personal.
What question I end up going for is pretty context dependent, like if someone just arrived somewhere then “get here okay?” or similar questions about their transit are an easy replacement that’s a lot less invasive imo.
If the person has made any conscious fashion choices I notice and like that’s another easy one, though ‘conscious choice’ is key (“I like your hair” or “nice stickers on your water bottle” are good, but “you have nice skin” is serial killer vibes imo).
Finding alternatives requires a tiny bit of thought each time, but imo that’s what communicating with another person should need.