Most American millennials I know have the same retirement plan as myself : a bullet or shotgun shell to the brainstem.

Why? The reasons vary:

American optimism gave us big dreams, but the American economy crushed them.

The open internet made us realize that we are, in fact, the baddies on the world stage.

A decent retirement for millennials will cost $6-10million, a feat most cannot achieve without inheritance.

Climate change is making our only planet uninhabitable, and our nation is leading the effort to make it even worse.