Sometimes I unblock the notification/inbox element to check if I’ve missed DMs. I keep it blocked so I can choose which discussions to disengage from without having to be reminded of my past cringe / generally live in blissful ign’ance .

This is only going to get worse the longer I post. I may have made a miscalculation in my coping strats.

  • JustSo [she/her, any]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
    8·
    8 months ago

    btw go listen to Front 242 if u like industrial. pretty cool number now that I’m looking at it again.

    dont reply to me or my threads ever again and ruin this.

    • JustSo [she/her, any]@hexbear.netOPEnglish
      2·
      7 months ago

      Oh no, I do that too. I just keep them open in tabs and compulsively reload.

      Honestly it’s just a really specific point in time in hexbear before I left for some months where I’d called some people out, and tbh called a lot of the site out, for some shit that felt really wrong to me. I was feeling disillusioned with the whole fucken site that people were talking about certain things and while I was ready to tell em whats up I was not in the mood to argue about the fuckin benefits of representation of “non fake” women’s bodies in porn and “how far we’ve come” when you can watch “all kinds” of women’s bodies on the internet to get your rocks off.

      Like fuck right off. I only hit that guy with the transphobic part of what was wrong with his post. But it is obviously much more complex than that, I didn’t have the energy, I felt like a hexbear should’ve known better to come here to pat themselves on the back after a gooning session.

      Then I semi effort posted about the fact that the coconut shit that was floating around in the kamala memeplex is heavily racially coded in my part of the world and has a long history. I’ve had American friends cancel me out of their lives forever before I learned you can’t sing the N word along with the black folk while listening to rap. We have a different history with colonialism and racism and slavery here, so to see such a progressive forum just jump at the chance to use this new to them slur, without stopping to think about the context of a black grandfather talking to his kin and just appropriating that language. I dunno. N word gets you knocked out in the states, calling someone a coconut around here gets you knocked the fuck out just the same. Either way it’s fucked up and I was just done with hexbear.

      Given that anything in my inbox would have been related to that, when I decided to come back I just blocked the element so I wouldn’t have to think about or see any of it. I might leave it all unblocked now. I’ve missed a few nice DMs and surprisingly few negative responses to my posting and I’m hardly a perfect specimen of socialist praxis and communication.

      Anyway, as a result of that, I will compulsively check a thread until it dies. As a byproduct I’m also getting weirdly good at meta-gaming / bumping posts into relevance etc. Not that I’m doing it on purpose but I’ve kinda figured out how “the game” can be played if you wanna be a reddit weirdo attention seeker about things. Or boost someone else’s good shit.

      Whatever. Long story short, however you look at it I’m terminally online.