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Apple uses automated schnapps IVs.

Transcript

[A graph with “programming skill” on the Y-axis and “blood alcohol concentration” on the X-axis. The Y-axis slowly goes down, but spikes at 0.1337%.]
[Cueball is making a presentation with the graph.]
Cueball: Called the Ballmer Peak, it was discovered by Microsoft in the 80’s. The cause is unknown but somehow a B.A.C between 0.129% and 0.138% confers superhuman programming ability.
Cueball: However, it’s a delicate effect requiring careful calibration – you can’t just give a team of coders a year’s supply of whiskey and tell them to get cracking.
Spectator: …Has that ever happened?
Cueball: Remember Windows ME?
Spectator: I knew it!

  • lars@lemmy.sdf.org
    15·
    2 年前

    When I’m drunk, either:

    • my foreign-language-speaking skills are amazingly good, or
    • my perception of my foreign-language-speaking skills is amazingly bad
    • fkn@lemmy.world
      8·
      2 年前

      It’s both. Your inhibitions are lower so you speak more naturally and use more words without consideration of correctness which, if you think about it, is fine generally. Native speakers of a language are amazingly good at deduction of what a non native speaker is intending. You also don’t pay attention to your mistakes, which makes the conversation flow easier for everyone.

      • Deebster@programming.devEnglish
        1·
        2 年前

        For me, it’s also a matter speaking louder - I have a (normal, I think) tendency to say things I’m unsure of quieter, so sometimes I’ve mumbled something that was correct (or correct enough) causing the very communication problems I was worried about.

  • Mikina@programming.dev
    3·
    2 年前

    Isnt 0.14% of alcohol in blood concentration pretty high? Thats like 5 shots of 40% liquor, or 5 500ml beers.

  • FluffyPotato@lemm.ee
    2·
    2 年前

    Microsoft must have been binge drinking since Windows 7 was released. The teams that manage the rest of their software must not even know what it’s like to be remotely sober, I’m surprised the Outlook server team hasn’t died.